NostraGimler
by Tommy Gimler I talked to God last night. Or it might have been my fiance’s purse dog. I don’t know. I was pretty blitzed. But this is what he said is going to happen in baseball’s second half. The...
View ArticleStuds and DUDs of the Week
by Tommy Gimler Ohio was a bipolar state last week as the Reds were amazing again and the Indians were just brutal. Oh, and Aroldis Chapman is a prick… Stud Team of the Week – Cincinnati Reds (5-2)...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Comparing This Baseball Season To Broads
by Tommy Gimler They say that sports, art, and prison rape often imitate real life, and it couldn’t be more true in regards to the 2012 Major League Baseball season. In fact, a closer look at some...
View ArticleThe Cleveland Indians’ Spring Training Invitees Were Awesome…Five Or Six...
by Tommy Gimler We bet if you would have asked Cleveland Indians GM Chris Antonetti five years after he graduated high school if he still wanted to plow the homecoming queen, he would have said yes...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Which Number Will Be Greater, Mike Trout Stolen Bases Or Houston Astros...
by Tommy Gimler and Jeffrey Leinenkugel With pitchers and catchers for every MLB team set to report to Spring Training by tomorrow at the latest, we can finally stop talking about annoying offseason...
View Article2013 MLB Over/Under Win Totals Are Out
by Tommy Gimler The Atlantis Casino in Reno might be as irrelevant as Mindy McCready’s life 364 days of the year, but for the last seven years, they have been the first sportsbook to release Major...
View ArticleDUD MLB Preview: The AL Central
by Tommy Gimler Even my grandma knows that the Tigers are going to win the AL Central, and she’s been dead for eight years. But for the first time in decades, the Kansas City Royals have a roster made...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Get The Shit Out Of Your Ears: Our First DUDcast
by Tommy Gimler and Michael Louis What do you get when you lock five sports fans and a comedian in a condo loaded with two bottles of Glenfiddich, eighteen Bud Lights, and a high-speed internet...
View ArticleHere Are Some Mind Blowing Baseball Stats
by Tommy Gimler A friend of mine told me over the weekend that he couldn’t get into this year’s baseball season because there is nothing exciting to follow. Fuck him. There is plenty happening in MLB...
View ArticleWho Are The Worst Fans In Major League Baseball?
by Tommy Gimler I ran into a Dodgers “fan” at the local liquor store this afternoon who surprisingly spoke English and was actually paying for his unusual order of Keystone Light and two cups of...
View ArticleThe DUD MLB Midseason Report: American League
by Tommy Gimler If you had Baltimore’s Chris Davis hitting 30 home runs through 82 games, you’re a fucking liar. Likewise, nobody pegged his teammate Manny Machado to be on pace to break the Major...
View ArticleFantasy Dork Alert: These Turds Are Keeping You From Winning The Whole...
by Tommy Gimler With only six weeks remaining in the regular season in most head-to-head fantasy baseball leagues, dorks everywhere are scrambling to assemble the perfect team for a late season push...
View ArticleTake The Gun Out Of Your Mouth, Cleveland, Because The Indians Are Going To...
by Tommy Gimler Holy Christ. Being a sports fan in Cleveland these days is a lot like dating a bipolar broad. Yesterday, we touched on the Cleveland Browns front office assuring their fans of another...
View ArticleHere’s How Our MLB Predictions Stood Up Against The “Experts”
by Tommy Gimler Let’s be honest. If you put your entire unborn child’s community college fund behind our MLB over/under predictions this year, you’re a fucking idiot. Now is as good of a time as any...
View Article2014 MLB Over/Under Win Totals Are Out, You Hookers
by Tommy Gimler The thugs in Vegas have released the 2014 over/under win totals for all 30 Major League Baseball teams, and let’s just say there are a few more surprises than getting into a car with...
View ArticleDUD MLB Preview: Cleveland Indians
by Tommy Gimler The Tribe won their final ten games last year, and they needed every single one of them to make their first trip to the postseason since 2007. A return trip in 2014 isn’t out of the...
View ArticleAn Umpire Took A Line Drive To His Nards Yesterday
by Tommy Gimler Try telling umpire Brad Myers that spring training doesn’t mean anything, and he’ll probably rip your fucking nuts off. Now, on the surface that might seem like a slight overreaction,...
View ArticleHey, John Axford Sucks Again
by Tommy Gimler Only in meteorology, Congress, and sports can you be a worthless turd and still earn some pretty good coin. The Cleveland Indians gave John Axford $5 million in the offseason to finish...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Unacceptable Jerseys For True Baseball Fans
by Tommy Gimler I actually paid for tickets to a Brewers-Pirates game last week, and I almost puked while tailgating with my old man in the Gorman Thomas section of the parking lot. Only this time it...
View ArticleJapanese Pitcher And Former Gay Porn Star Throws Perfect Eephus Pitch But...
by Tommy Gimler Lets be honest. That might be one of the most attention-grabbing headlines of all-time. Awwww ditta! Former Cleveland Indians turd pitcher and gay porn star Kazuhito Tadano now pitches...
View Article