by Tommy Gimler
If the legendary Lou Brown was still here, you’d probably hear him say something to the effect of, “You might live in Hollywood, but you look like shit.”
Winners of 16 straight, the real-life Cleveland Indians are hotter than Kate Upton scissoring Charlotte McKinney on my wife’s bed while Hannah Davis Jeter flicks her bean in the corner as she looks on.
Since losing 6-1 to Boston on August 23, Cleveland has scored first in every single game. They have trailed only twice during the franchise-best winning streak, and they have curb stomped their opponents to the tune of 114-28. So yeah, they’re obviously hotter than shit.
Corbin Bernsen, Tom Berenger and Charlie Sheen? Yeah, not so much:
Jesus. Fucking. Christ.
Look, I get that people get older on this planet and the years are kinder to some more than others, but I think one line pretty much sums up what I’m looking at here: Stay the fuck away from drugs, kids.
We actually showed the reunion picture of the Major League stars to Jim Carrey, and the cameras were rolling for the moment he laid eyes on the pic:
Go Tribe…
Wait, there’s more: These Should All Be Winning College Football And NFL Gambling Picks, Bro
You have got to see this shit:
Us: A sac fly will tie it.
MAT: pic.twitter.com/sffZZCLxtk
— Washington Nationals (@Nationals) September 9, 2017